Her
by mermaidxwriter
Summary: a weird angsty Jeyna poem


**Her**

Everything is blurry when he wakes

but he is not alone

the girl next to him has eyes that glow

they shift from blue, to brown, to green

she is lovely

but she isn't her.

He is a son of Jupiter

and sons of Jupiter must follow orders

especially those of Juno.

When they arrive at an unfamiliar place

atop an old hill

he tells himself this is what Juno wants

because what he wants doesn't matter

it never did.

The girl's name is Piper

he finds out

and she is adventurous and caring.

She calls him "Sparky"

and laughs like the color of the sky

She's great really

but she isn't her.

There's a big problem

he can't remember her much.

So he and Piper begin to date

because that's what everyone wants

the Aphrodite Cabin calls them

"The Most Beautiful Couple since Helen and Paris"

The attention makes Jason uncomfortable

He's a son of Jupiter

he should be used to it everywhere he goes

but he desperately wants to keep his private matters private

but what he wants doesn't matter

it never did.

Bad times are ahead

everyone at camp can tell

Death hangs in the air

but Piper is optimistic

She squeezes his hand "Love defeats all"

She isn't wrong

but Jason wouldn't call what they have love.

How would an orphaned son of Jupiter know what love it?

He doesn't but he knows one thing

but she isn't her.

When their ship lands in New Rome

Jason wants to throw up.

There's a lot riding on his shoulders.

He doesn't want to risk his life

for gods that have neglected him

He wants to run.

To go somewhere where even the gods can't find him

But he smiles and steps out into the cool California breeze

Next to him Piper takes his hand in hers

and it doesn't feel quite right

He appreciates the reassurance

but she isn't her.

He spots her instantly

she looks the same

she's still _so_ beautiful and _so_ powerful

like the sky before a storm

Jason is relieved

so much has changed since he left

but she hasn't.

He wants to run up to her like Percy and Annabeth

he wants to hold her tight and kiss her forehead

just like old times

but he doesn't.

because he wants doesn't matter

it never did.

Jason can tell she's hurt

but she's too strong to show it

He looks down at his hand linked with Piper's

and he feels shame.

She deserves better than this

they both do.

Does nobody realize that he is a pawn

nothing more, nothing less?

He disappoints everyone close to him

that's why Jupiter left

and Beryl too

Thalia made it out alive

because she left.

Piper swears she won't leave him

till death do them part.

Jason should be ecstatic

but she isn't her.

The war ends

too many people die.

Most of them too young to drive

Jason has seen too many horrible things

to be considered a healthy teenager

The gods ask him to build shrines

and he wants to spit in their faces

because they don't give a shit

about their dead kids

they just want to be worshiped more.

but Jason does as they ask

because what he wants doesn't matter

it never did.

He hears her laugh

and he can't help but stare

she looks so young and carefree

with her head thrown back and flushed cheeks

in the middle of the dining pavilion

It's been too long.

He realizes then

that they haven't spoken

in close to a year.

And in that moment he's had enough

he walks up to her

his heart heavy

Her smile disappears

but it's too late to turn back now.

His voice is soft as he asks her to talk.

They walk to his cabin in silence

everyone is staring, Piper included

but Jason doesn't care.

He needs to fix this, if not now then he never will.

She opens her mouth to speak, then closes it

her hands are clenched in fists.

Her eyes blaze with anger as he apologizes

he tells her the truth, all of it

She doesn't react

and for the first time in his life

Jason is truly, unequivocally scared.

He doesn't know who moved first

but his lips meet hers in the sweetest way

he hears angels sing as he grips her hips

and he lets his body do the rest of the talking.

They fit together perfectly, he realizes

as they cuddle in the afterglow.

She looks down at their intertwined fingers

and back up at him

her pouty, pink lips smiling

"You're not off the hook, Grace."

And he laughs

a good, real laugh

for the first time since he went missing

because he found her.


End file.
